Category Archives: The Fresh Roll


It’s everywhere. There’s a run on the liquor stores, everybody’s Facebook got their “omg p0wer’z out!!!” statuses and almost 28 percent of Pepco customers in the area are “affected”:

(If you’re curious, the Pepco interactive outage map is pretty cool looking. If only they were as efficient at fixing things as they were at compiling data.)

D.C and P.G. County public schools are closed tomorrow; no word from our school yet but someone on a sorority listserv writes that she’s heard from someone “close to the university” that the university will be closed tomorrow. There you have it folks — it falls to you whether or not you believe both a sorority girl AND an anonymous source. The official word will allegedly come from the UMD emergency preparedness website.



The Fresh Roll: Turtle REPLACED?!

We might have a new bar in town! Like, a real one! From the PG Gazette’s David Hill:

The now-defunct Thirsty Turtle bar in College Park could soon be replaced, and city officials hope its proposed replacement won’t prove as problematic as its predecessors.

John McManus, owner of The Barking Dog in Bethesda, has expressed interest in opening a second location at 7416 Baltimore Ave. in College Park, formerly home to Thirsty Turtle. McManus is scheduled to go before the Prince George’s County Board of License Commissioners on Feb. 22 to request a liquor license for the property.

But, from Bailey Henneberg at College Park Patch:

Although McManus’ liquor license for 7416 Baltimore Ave. is on the Board of License Commissioners’ official agenda, his plans may not be set. Patch talked with The Barking Dog’s general manager Christiana Hallas Tuesday afternoon about the potential for McManus starting a new operation in College Park.

“As far as I know, he’s not inquired into that,” said Hallas, who has worked for McManus for 10 years. She recalled times in the past when he looked into establishing new locations, but those didn’t pan out.

“I talk to him more than my husband,” Hallas said, explaining that he normally lets her in on his plans, yet she has heard nothing about him setting up in the Thirsty Turtle’s spot.

Sounds like this McManus character is a secretive fellow, keeping his plans from his general manager. I like it. Secretive fellows let more high-schoolers dance on their bar and get squirted with water. Also I think old Christiana needs marriage counseling.

Also revealed: Turtle owner Alan Wanuck has 17 years left on his lease. I don’t know a lot about leasing things, but I don’t know that I would sign up for anything and promise to stick around for two decades. That’s like, three marriages, minimum.

We’ll keep you updated.



WE’VE DONE IT! University of Maryland users became the number one users of Sporcle in the ENTIRE COUNTRY last week, overtaking the pale, shivering bastards at the University of Michigan with a mind-blowing 105,840 points.

"World fucking champions."

I don’t have any idea what these points signify, but the Terps have more than anybody else so a big “hell yeah” goes out to all you Sporclers stepping it up and hitting those ambiguous benchmarks. Our football team may be playing a cold-weather bowl against some crap called “East Carolina,” but our pointless online quiz ranking is primo.

The ACC as a whole was very well represented: Boston College came in fourth and UNC took the 6 spot, and the rest of the ACC schools made the top 25 except for Virginia, Florida State and Miami. No surprises there. Chumps.


[hat tip: David P. from the windy city]

The Fresh Roll exclusive: 7-Eleven to get REAL renovated, son

The 7-Eleven on Knox Road will be closing next Wednesday until Jan. 22, according to the owner. He is nice. His name is Million. He has a mustache.

And they’re planning big things: he said workers will be working in around-the-clock shifts to finish the job before the spring semester starts.

They plan to expand the rear of the store by 12 feet, shift the registers over to the left wall and put the drink fridges in the middle, where the candy is now. He said it’s going to be “a whole new store.” I am inclined to enthusiastically agree, so long as this “new store” still sells iced tea and taquitos. Is there an ‘s’ in that? Taquitoes? I don’t know; spell check is flummoxed too.

In other news, the China Cafe, that random Chinese restaurant next door to the 7-Eleven, will be opening back up Dec. 15. No word yet on if anyone cares.


The Fresh Roll Exclusive: 7-ELEVEN CLOSING

Update 12/8: An employee reports Wednesday, Dec. 15 will be the last night 7-Eleven will be open.

The 7-Eleven on Knox Road in College Park will be closing for renovations sometime after finals week, according to two employees at the store, one of whom said it would be two months before they opened up again. No word yet on where the hell we’re supposed to get our cheeseburger big bites at 4 a.m. now. More to come very soon.


The Fresh Roll: New bus timer thing

The Fresh Roll is a new Bathroom Inventory column focusing on UMD news and events. Expect much more to come. Send news tips to umdbathrooms AT

The days of figuring out when the next bus is coming by poking at that little electronic thing at the campus bus stops are apparently gone:

These little babies are now up at a bunch of bus stops, and they work, though it appears whoever is responding to the texts is using their elbow instead of their fingers. Here’s the correspondence that occurred when I tested the sign above, located in front of the Art-Soc building: Continue reading

The Fresh Roll: Cstone finally gets the recognition it deserves

The Fresh Roll is a new Bathroom Inventory column focusing on UMD news and events. Expect much more to come. Send news tips to umdbathrooms AT

Complex Magazine just released a list of the 50 best college bars in America: and, sure ’nuff, Cornerstone Grill and Loft was right there at number 45, though it probably could have been higher — number one was in Nebraska, and number two was at the University of Colorado, Boulder and snagged the honors by having “tasty cheap brews and a big-ass dance floor.” If that’s all it takes, I know a VFW outside of Philly that probably qualifies for the top 10.

Either way, Cornerstone, well done. We at the Inventory raise a Big Ass Draft in your honor.