Stamp Student Union, second floor, bathroom one

Directions: Walk in the main door of Stamp and turn left down the hallway. You will see a small alcove with weird brass mailboxes on the left, and there will be a door to a set of stairs. Take the stairs up one level and walk through the door to the second floor. Immediately turn left; it will be the only door on your right.

REPORT CARD

Cleanliness: A+

It’s in the building that is considered to be the hub of all campus activity. A lot of people use it, and the conferences held up here are usually fancy speaking engagements and whatnot so they definitely pay attention to appearances. Also, the faucets GLIMMER like the smile of a unicorn and there’s two-ply toilet paper.

Odor: A+

It smells clean without that “public swimming pool” aroma.

Solitude: A-

There are frequently events held in the rooms up here, but there are a ton of stalls and it’s definitely not a high-traffic area.

Lighting: A+

Soft lighting in most of the room, gleaming florescents over the stalls. Perfection.

Facilities

Stalls: 6, motion flush

Urinals: 2, motion flush

Sinks: 4, motion faucet

Notes: A beautiful (and very accessible) bathroom certainly not made that way for the benefit of UMD students. Take advantage! And don’t worry about the crowds around the second floor — they’re always busy, and seem to much prefer going downstairs for some reason.

—Rich

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3 responses to “Stamp Student Union, second floor, bathroom one

  1. I just dropped a deuce in this bathroom and was sheerly STUNNED. This is quite the hidden gem… Stamps best kept secret. It was a clean undisturbed poop, on that I have not experienced all semester. Great post Rich, this one made my day.

  2. LastSecond Dumper

    I was sitting in a presentation in the second floor of Stamp and was dying trying to hold it for an hour and a half. I thought I was going to explode. The second the presentation ended, I frantically ran around the halls looking for a bathroom, and like I was guided by some mystical presence, I came across this bathroom. Not only was it a life-saver, but this bathroom became an incredible haven. The bathroom is beautiful, it doesn’t smell, there was no one in it and I didn’t feel rushed. All around, the best bathroom to find in the clutch. My only weird experience was a phantom faucet that kept going off.

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